For Americans, the “Beer Goggles” are off

Boston Globe columnist Brian McGrory was so dismayed by the historic Scott Brown victory in Massachusetts, that he compares the experience with being date raped, complete with the sting of regret and the pain of violation.  The haunting detail of his commentary would suggest that McGrory himself has an intimate knowledge of such affairs; only the question of which end of the seduction he found himself on remains a mystery.

While McGrory accuses the majority of Massachusetts voters of being loose enough to fall for the advances of a predatory rapist, he fails to make a similar – and more accurate – connection involving an entire nation being swooned by perhaps the most prolific political swindler the United States has seen in some time.

In the great toga party that was the general election of 2008, a depressed and frustrated citizenry turned to the political bottle to drown their sorrows of imminent recession, prolonged wars, and bloated government.  They drank the ‘hope and change’ elixir into a hopelessly inebriated state, clouding their judgment and enabling a smooth-tongued and crafty campaigner to bring them back to his place for a night of political euphoria.

In popular culture, the aforementioned phenomenon is referred to as “Beer Goggles”.  With just enough firewater consumed, social inhibitions are suppressed and everyone in the room becomes a certifiable “10”; every girl is a supermodel and every guy a hunky beacon of untamed manhood.  For the promiscuous among us, the age-old adage of “drink ‘til they’re cute” represents a willingness to ignore imperfection of the means, in order to get to the happy ending they so powerfully desire.

But as is always the case, the dawn breaks and reality sets in.

That hottie from the bar you managed to bring home?  Turns out she’s a homely clinger who is planning to stay through the weekend and mistakenly left her crazy pills in her other clutch purse.  And that stud who is a charitable giver?  He left at 3:00 AM to play Xbox with his roommates, and the only thing he gave you was a scathing itch and an appointment with your physician.

And what about that fresh, young politician who whimsically swept you off your feet with promises of hope, change, and a break from business as usual in government?  Turns out he’s far worse than the status quo, a blatant ideologue with only three impotent, yet universally lethal, arrows in his tiny quiver: raise taxes, borrow money, and grow government.

It was political beer goggles that caused American voters to put a radical statist into the White House, and as evidenced by big Republican victories in Massachusetts, New Jersey and Virginia, the country is starting to wake up from it’s drunken stupor.  But like a nagging hangover and a one night stand, the regret of Obama’s election cannot simply be washed from our memory.

The disastrous effects of an unchecked Obama presidency and huge majorities in both the House and Senate have the potential to last far beyond one mistake-filled year.  You may have successfully evaded your one-night lover, but that tattoo they convinced you to get won’t go away without prolonged cost and pain.

For Mr. McGrory and the rest of the intellectual left, Scott Brown is scorned because he crashed the liberal’s party by turning on the lights of common sense.  For increasingly reasonable Americans, Brown represents a commanding father figure who saves his daughter from the bowels of depravity, and restores her to a life of purpose and happiness.  His simple message to Obama: “the party is over”.

Brown was able to capture the attention of a sobering-up commonwealth and effectively articulated Obama’s agenda for what it really is: a freedom-killing lurch in government size and influence.  “You have the most beautiful eyes” may be a homerun in the dark and noisy shroud of nightclubs, but in the light of day it is fervently rejected as unimpressive.

The beer goggles are off and we’re starting to hear Obama votes utter the phrase: “I’ll never drink again.”  Massachusetts voters have chosen to go steady with a man they feel comfortable bringing home to meet mom and dad: smart, prudent, and respectable.

What remains to be seen is whether or not voters will permanently wise up to the disingenuous advances of ill-intentioned politicians.  While the past two years may have taught them to be immune to the classic pick-up lines, crafty wordsmiths are adapting their vernacular to reflect a now smarter prey.

Almost overnight, we witnessed Obama pivot from healthcare to jobs.  Has his agenda changed?  Absolutely not; but we have seen, and will continue to see, an increase in his use of poll-tested buzzwords aimed at averting voters’ enhanced defenses.

If the country ever decides to graduate from juvenile fits of emotion and reckless abandon, we will see a populous that will perennially vote for mature leaders who espouse grown-up principles.  The elections of several Republicans to key positions in traditionally liberal states are a good sign that maybe – just maybe – the country is ready to carry on a steady, committed, adult relationship with their government.